Made from the earth, I was. Plain and simple. Well, I wouldn't call it earth exactly, but tar is pretty much the same when it comes down to it. I smell of turpentine and don a dilapidated straw hat, so I'm not the best company to keep. The worst part of it is that Brer Fox went up and forgot to give me a mouth. To think of how simple it would have been for him! Just a poke under my nose would have sufficed perfectly! All I am able to do is sit here and ruminate while my molasses heap of a body melts and bubbles under the unforgiving, albeit cheerful, Southern sun.
Ah! Here comes someone now to break up my tedious monologue. Looks like it's a rabbit in overalls. If that's the case, I must be getting heatstroke. Here we go; he's walking straight towards me.
"Mawnin'! Nice wedder dis mawin'"
What in the world did he just say!? I cannot understand him to save my life. I'm struggling to form words, but I quickly remember my lack of a voice. My only response is the sound of the bubbling tar on my body.
"How you come on, den? Is you deaf? Kaze if you is, I kin holler louder."
I wish I could just tell him what the deal is. He seems to be a pretty gentle person.
"You er stuck up, dat's w'at you is, en I'm gwine ter kyore you, dat's w'at I'm a gwine ter do."
I've stopped listened to what he says, and can you blame me? I can barely distinguish his vowels from his consonants. I'll just wait here until he gets bored and leaves me alone.
SMACK!
Holy cow! He hit me! What in the world did I do to deserve this? To be honest, it was a really bad decision on his part. His fist sank deep into my molten jaw. Looks like we're hitched.
"Ef you don't lemme loose, I'll knock you again"
Listen man, if I could speak, I explain everything. But still, I can't just 'unmelt' myself.
WHAM!
Well, there go his feet. I can tell where this is heading. At least I'll have company from now on.
Author's Note: I decided to write from the Tar-Baby's perspective in
one of the first stories in the
Brer Rabbit I unit. Though this, I wanted to also make a satirical comment on how well the dialect is written in the original story.
Bibliography:
Joel Chandler Harris
Uncle Remus: His Songs and His Sayings
1881